Moving On

Photo by Jeannette

“Silence is often misinterpreted but never misquoted”

__________

How dare you make me want you!!
It was so much easier when you were just
A figment of my imagination – when I just
Wanted you from afar……. when I only
Dreamed of what it would be like – a time
When I was truly invisible to you – just a blur,
A bleep in time. Never forced you to notice
Me – never let on that I wanted to know
What was behind those eyes – that sweet spirit
Of yours hugging close to my frame – drawing
Me to you, making me nervous, restless

And then you saw me and I wanted that chance
And I asked “Can I have a chance?”

Things were easy between us – your touch –
That chemistry – that unknown as to how or why
People attract to one another. Soaking up all I
Could take. Needing more of you – you pushed
Me away. My soul screaming ,”You should let me
Love you!!!!” but you wouldn’t. If I had the
Nerve to say what’s on my mind I’d tell you
How miserable I’ve been since your absence
From my life. I’d probably curse you out for
Making me want you and then disappearing.
Your silence is killing my spirit and I fight just
To stay relevant.

Somehow I know you’re forever lost to me.
As quickly as you slipped into my world is
Just how quickly you disappeared. You hide within
Your shell never daring to come out to see the
Sun. Never finding your way back to me – to
Even the possibility of us. The silence deafening!!

I peer into a dark glass unable to see clearly
What it is you’re not saying. You had an
Agenda all your own. The meeting is over
And done and I never knew the script.
My soul cries because of all the things left
Unsaid, all the things left undone and now
I’m left to fade into the background. My
Voice becoming background noise of your
Existence. I’m forced to go back
To being invisible – I never knew you.

And someday when my heart catches up I’ll be fine.

“Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are part of your history, but not part of your destiny” Steve Maraboli